"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. Isaiah 55:8

My Famous Husband………..what? You have never heard of my husband? Well one of his famous quotes I should say is “That’s not how I’d do it”. If I had a nickel for every time I have heard that I would be……………still, well not rich. But for the past little while I have been struggling with something. Not a full blown I just can’t function while going through this trial, but just a nagging question mark as to why something is going on in our lives and how God has brought things about. I just have this big "Are you sure" in my mind. Why would he allow this to be this way? (Because that sure isn’t how I’d do it!) What is he doing? While praying concerning these situations we asked that God would be glorified and the people in the situations would come to either know God truly or grow closer through it. I have seen growth at time and we praise him for it, but I also see him asking more of us, ok me, and doesn’t He know how busy I am? Yeah, you can laugh, only if you have had the same thoughts as well. I know His desire is that everyone come to Him. I just never figured he was doing some work on me in the mean time. You see, His ways are not the ways you and I would figure on, we can’t even begin to see the big picture, I don’t even think I see the little picture, or if I am even looking at the same picture. How does he put up with me?
You see all the while I was praying for God to work in these other situations, these “other peoples” lives, he was working it out for me to get some testing, trying and trials. I even heard myself thinking Why Lord? Why? But God knows me, he knows what I need to grow to be more like him, so that my life will Glorify him, and now I am having growing pains.
You see if it was up to me……..well this is how I’d do it, I would pray for these situations and encourage as long as it isn’t really crossing my comfort line, yeah well, with God there are no lines. I have been praying to know Him more, to trust Him more, to be useful. I thought maybe through prayer, meditation and just spending time in fellowship, you know the good stuff? But now it seems as if He is asking much more. As we are put under heat, testing our faith, we seem to believe the intensity is too much, and we will never make it through the fire. Our human desire is to give up and retreat. Through the fire, the pressure of removing the junk of selfishness, bitterness and pride seems intense, though it's only a matter of allowing them to surface within our own hearts and minds. When a heating pressure is applied to our lives, God is beginning the change in us, in me. Though we often question God as to why we are being persecuted we soon come to find that God is blessing us with the very thing we thought was the curse.